Rephorm on the Rocks

How the rich cornered the market on great ideas to $ave our failing public schools

When we last checked in with our rich friends, they were flush with cash and aflurry with many excellent ideas for saving our failed and failing public schools. Now, with the stock market ascendant and corporate profits at an all time high, these generous benefactors are themselves rising to new heights of generosity and excellence. Today’s outstanding idea is brought to us (and to our failing schools) by the rich of New York City who have come up with an idea so bold, so transformative, so disruptive that we have no choice but to raise our glasses to them. Continue reading

Amplify the Bottom Line (and Excellence)

Students who currently use outmoded devices like these MacBooks will experienced enhanced excellence once they are provided with Amplify tablets.

If only there was a miracle product that could fix the many problems plaguing our failing union-stifled public schools, all in the blink of a cursor’s eye. Reader: today is our lucky day. Edu-visionary and Edushyster transphormer-in-chief Joel Klein has the very miracle gizmo that will at last allow our stifled public school students to begin the long climb up mediocre mountain towards the acme of excellence and the peak of 21st century workplace skills. Continue reading

2013: All Hail The EduPreneur

Ah, New Year’s—a magical time in which we renounce bad habits (excuse making, achievement gap widening) and promise to embrace more lucrative ones (excellence, innovation, MacGyvering). And while 2013 may be barely upon us, it is already shaping up to be the Year of the EduPreneur. But before we raise our collective wine boxes in a toast, let us first meet this homo innovatus.

Pronounced ej-oo/ˈ prəˈno͝or/, this 21st century being understands the vital need of investing in our childrens’ futures—as long as he earns a return of 7% or more. The edupreneur, a close cousin to the edvestor and the edushyster, is consumed by a single burning question:  How can I crush the achievement gap? How can I make some money off of the little bastards? Quite effectively, it turns out. No matter how far short the edupreneur falls of his stated, altruistic goals, he always seems to end up with a wheelbarrow full of edu-bucks.
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Have a Very Rephormy Christmas!

And an excellent and innovative new year…

Still looking for the purrfect gift for that extra excellent and innovative someone in your life? Not to worry. EduShyster has assembled an assembly of offerings guaranteed to send test scores soaring all through the holidays and into 2013. So from my rephorm family to yours: ¡feliz navidad and a very prospero año! Continue reading

Joel Klein’s Edu-Cojones

Today we raise our collective wine boxes to a man who has the biggest, boldest edu-cojones in the business. Reader: meet Joel Klein, former NYC schools Chancellor turned edu-preneur—and most definitely turning a profit. When last we encountered Mr. Klein he’d just finished sounding the alarm bell about the greatest national security threat our country faces: our union-stifled public schools. But there is good news, reader. Joel Klein has now figured out the solution to the national security threat of our time—and it turns out to be the very edu-product that Klein himself is peddling. Continue reading